Good morning, everyone! I spent all night reading the Qur'an and as promised, here's my honest review!

... It's pretty much the same thing. Jesus is there. "These words are hallowed and thou shall not disobey them, lest you lose Allah's trust" and all that jazz. A lot less story and metaphor, which I enjoyed, but overall, nothing really new and really "out there" was presented.

I don't understand why catholics and muslims have been at war for millennia: they worship the exact same thing!

I give the Qur'ân four khatims out of five shahadahs - really decent stuff, do reccomend!

Leave a comment below if you have another book you want me to read.

Happy new year everybody! How you doin'? Finals week has me beat, euff!

Today I went to a bookstore and I found this neat copy of The Holy Bible. Heard about it before, somewhere, so I gave it a superficial demo read.

Flipped through some pages... pretty daunting stuff. Whoever wrote some of these stories clearly wasn't in a good headspace at the time. But there were at least some good things to pull from it, like, all those messages about being kind, keeping to yourself, trying to make your environment better for all who you share it with...

The writing is a little archaic at times and I'm a very scatterbrained reader. That and the story being told at break-neck speed really didn't help. It was hard to read through but I think I enjoyed it.

I give The Holy Bible four tetragrammatons out of five pentacles - really decent stuff, do reccomend!

Leave a comment below if you have another book you want me to read!

Today I spent a day with internet sensation and netizen superstar Yap Dollar. This little brother was all over the place.

We talked about a lot, especially politics and 持续不断的战争和入侵. Little needs to be said, he got yote in the Michael Wave.

Xiao hong shu!!

I don't know who drew this, I just kinda found it, but it rocks.

Why is he posed like that? Does Tails know how badass he looks?

This is me and my newborn son, Caran D'ache, which I am ambivalent towards.

Okay, get this. PDF collab. You make a PDF file, between 5 and 10 pages long. It can be about anything you want. No NSFW.

Some more guidelines would have to be added, but for a prototype this is enough.

It would be a genius collab.

But what the heck would I do with all the PDFs? How would I mash them up in a collab?

This is why I made this blogpost. Help me out here, will ye?

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Watched the FNAF movie yesternight.

God, what a shitshow.

My ugly ass on my way to watch the greatest cinematic event of this year.

I went to the theatre knowing it wasn't gonna be no Wolf of Wall Street, but with over ten years in the making, I was hoping they'd do something a little bit more impressive...

I mean, the animatronics looked pretty impressive, (most of) their movements were really convincing! Shoutouts to the guys at Jim Henson's, who designed the animatronics.

Now, the plot and everything else that consists of the movie was super convoluted (as all Five Nights at Freddy's media should be, to be fair) and very poorly planned out.

But I know what you're here for... I've been trying not to spoil anything of the movie because some people might not have watched it yet but are dying to know about the movie's real hook: the Markiplier and Freddy Fazbear sex scene!

I have to say, as soon as I handed the cashier 13€ I was starting to regret my entire venture... Until a shirtless Markiplier appeared on screen, no fanfare, straight to action, grappled Freddy in the middle of a jumpscare and began kissing the robot passionately, stroking its body. This went on for twenty uncut minutes until Mark broke the ice and said "I can feel you're hard... What do you say, Freddy, is it FNAFfing time or what?"

The two would engage in what I could only decribe as the most beautiful two and a half hours of my life. Their climax was probably where they dumped the film's entire budget and also probably why it took ten whole years to film this crap. I really think chumps like Christopher Nolan, Wes Anderson, Hondon Boomalay, the Wachowski sisters, James Cameron and other Cawthon wannabes should learn a thing or two from the FNAF movie.

In retrospect, I was probably a little bit too rash in the beginning of this post. Sometimes it's just like that- you can't truly enjoy something if you just focus on its less enjoyable traits.

My actual reaction when the movie ended.

I give the Five Nights at Freddy's movie a 4/10. Honestly? Not enough jumpscares.